Fridays are for ‘Reclaiming Words!’

The intent of this series is to explore words that I think need to be introduced — or re-introduced — to this current generation of college students.

These words have lost their meaning… or have been mis-used or redefined in unhelpful ways… and therefore need to be reclaimed and redefined (again) so that they can be realized by our students!

Today’s word: NO.

Following on the heels of last week’s word — YES, which had to do with our need to learn how to follow through with our commitments, be responsible, and ultimately… let our yes mean yes — it seemed important to follow-up with the kissing-cousin of yes… NO.

You see, I think these two words (while opposites) are intricately tied together… and our ability to use (and mean) one requires that we fully understand (and use) the other.

NO is a word that, among other things, is a negative used to express dissent, denial, or refusal, as in response to a question or request.

No… means no.

But I think we’ve come to fear using this word in our culture today (outside of those annoying telemarketing calls we get right in the middle of dinner)…

We fear letting others down.

We fear coming across as weak or incapable.

We fear missing out on an opportunity… or maybe even more so, we fear someone else getting (and succeeding in) an opportunity that we could have had.

So we say “yes,” but don’t really mean it.

We say “yes,” even though we know we probably won’t (be able to) follow through with it.

Learning to say “NO” is essential — an absolute “must” — for living lives of good health and balance in our world today.

Learning to say “NO” will allow us to more fully commit to those things that we say “yes” to.

Let’s look again at the passage we examined last week:

Again, you have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘Do not break your oath, but fulfill to the Lord the vows you have made.’ But I tell you, do not swear anoath at all: either by heaven, for it is God’s throne; or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. All you need to say is simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.” ~ Jesus (From the Sermon on the Mount — Matt. 5:33-37)

Learning to say “NO” in our “yes” culture is not a sign of weakness, but true strength.

It’s learning to be content with what we have — and not what we could have.

It’s turning to opportunities (even really good ones) so that we can fully give ourselves to a few great ones!

How would you (and your students) benefit from learning to use this word much more than “yes?”