Someone I respect recently noted that an unmistakable sense of anger among many young believers that affects the way they view the church and their faith. Anyone who has worked with students for even a short amount of time has probably experienced a flare of up this anger—particularly among those who have grown up in the church.
How do you respond?
First, recognize that many young adults have been hurt and angered by their experiences and encounters with Christians as well as the local church. Many young adults don’t know how to respond or process their experiences from a Biblical worldview. Anyone who has attended a church for very long has been hurt or offended or encountered people who say one thing and do another. That’s why it’s so important to establish realistic expectations of what young adults really will experience in church. It’s not a perfect place where you go to solve all of life’s problems. It’s a place where broken, imperfect people gather to experience Jesus together and grow through in relationship with God and each other.
Second, students and young adults need to be taught about the power of forgiveness. For some, this forgiveness extends back to the way they were raised and their early encounters with the church. For others, there’s a need to recognize the question isn’t whether offenses will happen in the church but rather how will you respond when they do. This type of forgiveness extends beyond dismissing an offense to actually blessing the offender through prayer.
Third, students need to recognize where they’re directing their anger. Because of their experiences, some will choose to become angry with the institution of the church while others will become angry with God. Encourage students to identify the source of their frustration and anger, more often than not, it will be with people’s depiction of God and the ways he works rather than the truth of what Scripture reveals about him.
Finally, it is vitally important to teach young adults how to handle confrontational situations with love and grace. It’s one thing to speak the truth; another thing to speak the truth in love. By handling your own situations with grace, you demonstrate to others how to handle confrontation in a Christ-like manner.
Teaching these lessons will take time. For someone whose hurt is fresh and whose wounds are still tender, it’s going to take a while for the healing that God intends to take place. The good news is that you can be part of that process by gently walking with someone through the journey of forgiveness and healing.
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